not the one
by Velithil
Summary: Heero's POV, songfic 1x2


_**Not the one**_

_you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?  
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?  
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call  
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all_

We broke up, his excuse that he is not the one for me. He feels that he is not the one for me but yet I know that he loves me. Then why does he still return my calls? Why do I feel alive when he is near? If he is not mine, I don't have the strength to get up and out of bed. I can't face the day with out him. How does our bodies fit each other perfectly and he still won't be the one?

_I never know what the future brings  
But I know you are here with me now  
We'll make it through  
And I hope you are the one I share my life with  
_

We will never know what the future holds unless we try. I want him with me, always. I know that we will have tough times and I know that there will be a time when enough is enough and we will want to give up. But we can make it through it all. If only he would relize that he is the one I want to share my life with. That he is ment for as I am ment for him._  
_

_I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?  
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?_

I want to disappear because I can't take living with out him. I just don't understand. If he is not the one then why does it hurt so much? Why does my heart say that he is, if he isn't? How would he know if he was or wasn't the one for me.

As I am sitting in my apartment asking myself these questions, when I should be going after him. I want him to tell me if there is any way for me to stay in his arms. I want to ask him if he still loves me. If he still thinks hes not the one. He has only been gone a week I'm sure I could still find him. If it wasn't for the fact that he wanted to be away from and asked me to stay away, I would have.__

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?  
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?  
If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?  
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?  


I want to ask him how he knows he is not the one for me. If i don't need him then why do I dream of him. Why does his name repeat it self over and over again in my head so I don't forget it. Why am I crying because it hurts so much to live with out him. I want him to answer all of these question. I want him to come back and see what my life has been like since he left. Down to the ring I got him a month ago I was going to ask him to be my husband, How do I live without him?

_  
I don't know why you're so far away  
But I know that this much is true  
We'll make it through  
And I hope you are the one I share my life with  
And I wish that you could be the one I die with  
And I pray in you're the one I build my home with  
I hope I love you all my life  
_

Now he is so far away from I don't know what to do. But I know that we could have made it if he didn't end it. I hoped I could spend my life with him. I wish he could be the one I die with... I spent the entire war with him to make sure that we both made it through so that we could die together later on in life when we are old and grey. I prayed that he would be there with me to build our home. I hoped to love him all my life, I take that back. I KNOW that I will love him all my life.

_  
I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am  
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?_

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away  
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today  
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right  
And though I can't be with you tonight  
And know my heart is by your side  


I miss him sooo much. His body and soul was so strong that it took my breath away. I want to hold him, be with him and I pray for the strength to be able to stand every single day. I love him, I admit it I love him. When I realised it, back during the war I kept quiet but when it was over and he was with me I wanted to shout it from the top of my lungs, I wanted to shout I LOVE DUO MAXWELL! Of course I didn't thats not in my character. I don't careif it is wrong to be with him, I don't care if it right to be with him, I just want to be with him. Through I am not with him now and may never be with him again, I know that my heart is always, always, going to be with him. I love him and will always dream of him...

_  
I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am  
Is there any way that I stay in your arms?  
_

(Duo's POV)

As I walk into the quiet apartment and look around I see that its not as neat as it should be with Heero in the apartment. Its quiet, too quiet, no sound not even the sound of someone typing. I walk further into the apartment and noticed that all the lights are off. Which is even weirder. I find him asleep in the room we used to share. His eyes are slightly puffy from crying. God how could I have ever think of leaving. But I'm not right for him, he deserves better. He deserves to live a normal life, get married and to have kids.

As I walked further into the room, I noticed that there is something on the bed next to him. I quietly walked over and picked it up. I'm surprised he didn't wake up, he usually a light sleeper, an old habit we picked durimg the war. The item I picked up was a small box. I opened the box to find a ring inside, that was a shocker, but also it had an ingraving in it. U_ were made 4 me._ I started crying. I don't want to leave him, but I can't take away his chance at being normal. I just don't understand, and what worries me most that he won't move on, it also worries me that he will. As I stood in the room staring at the ring he was going to give me, I realized that we are perfect for each other. Our bodies, our hearts, and our souls are made for each other. I took the ring out of the box and placed it on my ring finger. Then I proceeded to crawle into our bed. Heero moves to snuggle up against me. He always knew we were ment for eachother. As I lay here in his arms I realize that I will try anything to stay in his arms.

_**The End**_


End file.
